Lions club gears up for blood drive

The Luther Lions club owns and loans out several wheel chairs at no cost. However, several chairs are missing and they are asking that you check and see if perhaps you have one that you are no longer using. If you do, please return them to the Lions Club so they will be available to anyone who needs them now. The Lions Club is very generous with the medical equipment they own, and it is available to everyone.

The Lions Club would like to thank Jay Wallick for his contribution of a new lighted sign at the front of the Lions property.

Once again I remind you that the 23rd Luther Lioness Club Blood Drive will be held on August 26 at the Luther Lions Building, from noon until 5:45 p.m. If you have not been contacted, and would like an appointment, please feel free to contact me at 797-5541. Please remember to bring a picture ID and/or you donor card.

One winter morning a couple was listening to the radio over breakfast. They hear the announcer say, “We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even numbered side of the street, so the snowplows can get through.’ Norman’s wife Annie goes out and moves her car.

A week later while they are eating breakfast again, the radio announcer says, “We are expecting 10 to 12 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the odd numbered side of the street so the snowplows can get through.” Annie goes out and moves her car again.

The next week they are again having breakfast when the radio announcer says ‘We are expecting 12 to 14 inches of snow today. You must park…” Then the power goes out. Annie is very upset and with a worried look on her face she says, “Honey, I don’t know what to do. Which side of the street do I need to park on so the snowplows can get through?” With the love and understanding in his voice that all men who are married to blondes exhibit, Norman says… “Annie, why don’t you just leave it in the garage this time.”

Bubba and Billy Joe are walking down the street in Atlanta, and they see a sign on a store which reads, “suits $5.00 each. Shirts $2.00 each, trousers $2.50 each. Bubba says to his pal, Billy Joe, “Look here: We could buy a whole gob of these, take ‘em back to Sand Mountain, sell ‘em to our friends and make a fortune.”

“Just let me do the talkin’ cause if they hear your accent, they might think we’re ignorant and not wanna sell that stuff to us. Now, I’ll talk in a slow Georgia drawl so’s they don’t know we is from Alabama.”

They go in and Bubba with his best fake Georgia drawl, “I’ll take 50 of them suits at $5.00 each, 100 of them shirts at $2.00 each, 50 pairs of them there trousers at $2.50 each. I’ll back up my pickup and--”

The owner of the shop interrupts, “Ya’ll from South Alabama, ain’t ya?” “Well…yah,” says a surprised Bubba….”How come you knowed that?”

“Because this is a dry-cleaners.”

Last night Mitzi woke me up at about 1:30 a.m. She was standing on my chest. She does that when we are going to have a storm, and although I heard no thunder and there was no lightening, she persisted in trying to get close to me. Then I saw the problem: we had a BAT flying around the living room ceiling! So we chased it around, opening all the doors, hoping that it would fly out. Finally, I decided to go upstairs to my room and shut the door, which we did. I don’t know what happened to the bat. I hope it flew out one of the open doors, but I can’t be sure. In the meantime, I am keeping my fish net and my badmitten rackets close by.

Did you know: August is the month that bats try to take up residence in our houses? It is my understanding that the bats that were born in the spring are now kicked out of the nest by their mothers, and are looking for a new home. I wish I knew where they are coming in, but they tell me a bat can get in through the smallest little hole, just like a mouse can. Last night was not fun, and I will be happy when August is over and the bats go wherever they go for the winter!

Thought for the week; A real leader faces the music even when he doesn’t like the tune.

Have a good week.