LUTHER NEWS: A few stories for the hot summer days

The menu for the Luther site of the Lake County Meals program for the week of July 25 is as follows:

July 25 – Beef and noodles, mixed veggies, tossed salad, peaches

July 26 – Baked potato w/cheese sauce, bacon crumbles and broccoli, apricots

July 27 – Roast pork, mashed potatoes w/gravy, brussel sprouts, tropical fruit

July 28 – Chicken and dumplings, peas, sliced beets, melon

July 29 – Cheese ravioli w/sauce, California veggies, tossed salad, pineapple

The Italian Tomato Garden Story

An old Italian lived alone in New Jersey. He wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was very difficult work, as the ground was hard. His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament.

“Dear Vincent, I am feeling pretty sad because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I’m just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here my troubles would be over. I know you would be happy to dig the plot for me, like in the old days. Love, Papa”.

A few days later, he received a letter from his son. “Dear Papa, Don’t dig up that garden. That’s where the bodies are buried. Love,

Vinnie.”

At 4 a.m. the next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left.

That same day the old man received another letter from his son. “Dear Papa, go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That’s the best I could do under the circumstances. Love you, Vinnie.”

Guess there’s more than one way to skin a cat!

Another Holiday?

In Florida, an atheist created a case against Easter and Passover Holy Days. He hired an attorney to bring a discrimination case against Christians and Jews and observances of their holy days. The argument was that it was unfair that atheists had no such recognized days.

The case was brought before a judge. After listening to the passionate presentation by the lawyer, the judge banged his gavel declaring “ Case dismissed.” The lawyer immediately stood, objecting to the ruling, saying. “Your honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? The Christians haveChristmas, Easter and others. The Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah, yet my client and all other atheists have no such holidays.”

The judge leaned forward in his chair, saying, “But you do. Your client, counsel, is woefully ignorant.” The lawyer said, “Your Honor, we are unaware of any special observance or holiday for atheists.”

The judge said, “The calendar says April 1 is April Fools Day. Psalm 14:1states, ‘The fool says in his heart, there is no God.’ Thus, it is the opinion of this court, that, if your client says there is no God, then he is a fool. Therefore, April 1st is his day. Court is adjourned.”

You gotta love a judge that knows his scripture!

Both of the above stories were sent to me by my son-in-law’s Mom, Shirley Reitzel. She is the source of many of the stories I share with you, and I thank her for her contributions. Shirley has been battling cancer for about five years, but she still makes the effort to get this material to me. Great lady!

Did you know that the Luther Museum is open on Sunday afternoon for your enjoyment. Stop by and check it out.

Thought for the week: Education is what you get from reading the small print in a contract. Experience is what you get from not reading it.

Have a good week.